uk gangs banned phones bikes

The new head of CPS, Baljit Ubhey, has today announced some slightly strange plans to help eliminate gangs in the UK. British gang members will no longer be able to feel the wind in their hair as the cycle down the road. They’ll no longer be able to call their baby mothers on pay-as-you-go phones. And they’ll have to throw out all their favourite hoodies.

Ms Ubhey believes that the CPS have to be much firmer when it comes to prosecuting gang crime, announcing a tough line crackdown to reduce the number of gang crime. She said:

We need to make sure that the CPS is taking a really robust line when it comes to prosecuting gang crime,” she said. “This has such an impact on local communities that we’ve really got to take a very tough line

But founder of Gangs Unite, Colin James, insists that the new rules are “Ridiculous” and will “just make everything harder”. He told MailOnline:

I think some of the measures are ridiculous. Banning hoodies in the winter is just unfair. Do we stop everyone from wearing hoodies? Just stop making them. And bicycles – how is that going to help? We are going too far in our American-style approach. We need to look at it from an English perspective and come up with an approach that works!

Here’s a full breakdown of the new rules:

No more pay-as-you-go phones

Gang members will be banned from possessing pay-as-you-go phones to prevent them using these mobiles when planning or committing crimes.

No more hoodies

Some offenders could be ordered to stop wearing hoodies or other clothing which hides their identity.

No more cycling

Some gang members will be prohibited from cycling to stop them using their bikes to commit crimes or escape from police.

No more hanging around in your endz

Court orders barring gang members from the areas of the capital in which they operate.